Faith's Journey - Recovering Faith

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Faith's Journey - Recovering Faith

Debbie Peterson • January 24, 2024

What can we learn from horses, herd behavior, and the mistakes we make?

[PRO READING TIP: CLICK ON THE NUMBERS IN PARENTHESES, BELOW FOR A DEEPER DIVE.]

Have you ever failed at something, only to realize later that your fall was the result of starting on the wrong step in the process? Some call it "putting the cart before the horse." Often the cause of a misstep isn't that you did the wrong thing (although sometimes it is, and we will explore more about that in a future blog post); perhaps, you just did the thing at an inappropriate time and/or in an unwise way.

Knowing when, where, & how to start a new project, venture, or even a conversation, is important but, knowing WHY is key.

There is a point in every endeavor when the tendency is to veer this way or that. We lose focus, lose control, lose our moral compass, lose motivation or inspiration, and/or just plain lose our mind. At such moments we would do well to resist the mind-set that failure is our destiny. Our next choice matters! The point of this blog article is this: Choose to RECOVER.

Failure in life is inevitable. We don't know what we don't know so, falls, foibles & fails happen. The most successful people learn recovery skills. They start again, discover (or re-discover) their purpose and take each step a little differently and in better sequence the next time. Successful people don't forget the essentials: the re-circle (2) and the lick-n-chew (3)...

LEARNING FAITH FROM THE JOURNEY

All dressed for the weather and new video equipment in hand, I set out to record my first training video of this V-Blogging series - not that I am going to teach you how to train a horse. I am simply walking out my call and expressing my faith to you. All worthy calls, adventures, journeys - or whatever you want to call it - require FAITH in something or someONE bigger than you! My goal is to share my experience, strength and hope with YOU, my friends. On one cold and blustery day, I set out towards this goal...

I and my husband, Mike are well into our 60's, so this is no small undertaking for oldsters & amature horse trainers, but one to which we are drawn simply for the love of horses and the intrigue of new adventures! We have much to learn and many fears to overcome. Thank you for coming along!

For the safety of both horse and human handler, I believe the dominant, leadership role must be the played by the human. Our little filly, Faith won't stay small. If we neglect our responsibilities to her now, what is "cute" today won't be manageable when she is 15 hands (4) and over 1/2-ton of full-grown equis. [Caveat: Any parent of a teenager who regrets not establishing their authority with their child in the formative years, knows what I am talking about.] In a civilized world, the well-being of an inappropriately behaved thousand-pound beast is at risk - and the same goes for teenagers too. That is just the reality. Good manners matter. Given that we love our foal and realize that her destiny is to live amongst humanity, it is our responsibility to teach her and guide her to appropriate behavior. Then there is hope for mutual satisfaction in the relationship. (There is hope for you and your teenager too.)

I know what I want from my new filly. I think I know her potential, but we were quite unprepared for each other today. You don't know what you don't know... BUT that's no excuse for remaining ignorant, once you do know what you didn't know. So here, I am choosing to take a re-circle (2) and spend time reviewing what happened. Effective communication rarely happens when emotions are running out of control. Recovery is key!

Watch the video clip --> [CLICK]

The beauty of video is that we get to see later what we couldn't see at the first. Re-circle herd behavior (2) is similar. Reflection and re-assessment are higher-level thought processes and horses are capable of both. Thankfully, so are humans.

Did you notice the part in the video clip when Faith decided to bump me with her back-end? She wasn't overly aggressive, but she did have something to say and therefore, had her reasons for the inappropriate behavior. I'll share my lick-n-chew (3) on that later, but first let's examine the series of events and assess the situation. Come with me on my Re-Circle... (2)

I corrected Faith's dominant behavior by getting her attention with pressure on her face using the halter. That was my initial response and you will notice I expressed some emotion in the process. Emotion isn't good or bad; it will be expressed one way or another. Ideally, we will express ourselves honestly and openly, yet with a willingness to preserve the dignity (and felt-safety) of the other. As we surrender to the maturing process, our expressions become more and more refined and nuanced. As that happens, we also learn how to recover from negative emotions more quickly. That is part of what I call emotional integrity. And in the case of horse-training, we must guide our equine pro·té·gé to develop the same kind of self-control.

After the bumping incident, I sought out recovery. Notice I backed her a step or two to get her out of my space (albeit hindered by my short lead rope), and positioned myself to move her left hip over - the same hip that she used to bump me. I immediately went to her other side to move the other hip over, because I was taught that what we do on one side of the horse, we do on the other. That is when she attempted to step on my foot. (In hindsight, I should have given her a bit more time to process, before moving on to the other side.)

Yes, Faith and I were engaged in an argument! Not exactly how I had hoped to start off this session; a session that I resisted for days, by the way. (More about resistance in a future V-Blog post.) Faith was perturbed and uncooperative and probably somewhat confused. I was doubting my ability and losing confidence - and I was COLD. We were NOT connected partners prior to attempting effective communication. And that explains everything.

THE LICK-N-CHEW (3)

As the leader, I am charged with setting the tone for our interactions. I broke my own rule and let my partner down. From the start, Faith wasn't completely assured of her safety in a new space, apart from the herd. I just jumped in as if I cared nothing about who she was or whether or not she had something to say about my sudden interruption of her day. I could enumerate my excuses here, but what would be the point of that?

Connection is key. Recovery is the goal. How did I miss this initial step with her? My best guess is that we are still getting to know one another, but to be totally honest, I think it had more to do with my hurried mind-set, at the time. Never hurry - never worry. Once I processed what she was telling me, I decided to re-group and get connected with her in the barn, where at least the winter wind wouldn't bite so hard. The barn is also more familiar territory for us as new teammates. This first-time session away from her herd-mates, in the snowy yard was a bit too much, for both of us. I'll certainly think it through a little better next time.

I lead Faith into the barn to finish our lesson on a good note. Recovery requires a willingness to change - in this case, we changed our environment, which led to a change in attitude. Once inside, I tied her up. Tying is an important skill for horses to acquire and Faith already does this well. I groomed her with a curry (4) and picked her hooves (5), another skill she has acquired. Domestic horses need to be able to tolerate touching every part of their body. Why? Think farrier and medical care. What if there were an injury or illness that required a virtual stranger to perform an invasive procedure? For their own safety, we teach horses to let us touch them all over. Next, I sprinkled her with some Coat Defense(R) (6) to dry off her wet coat and prevent rain rot (7). That was a good place to end our time together. We exchanged opinions. We learned from each other. We enjoyed each other. Another good day of recovery (1)! I did not film the grooming session, because I wanted to remain singularly focused for the sake of connection with my young horse, but here is a quick video of enjoying each other on a subsequent day:

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How about your recovery (AKA JESUS WALK)? Are your relationships mutually satisfying? How is your relationship with God, spouse/family, church and community going? Please comment and share your personal experience, strength & hope. Here are some good words from God who loves you! 'Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching.' ~2 Timothy 4:2

Thank you for reading Faith's Journey today. Below is a link to the album of this month's photos and videos. Feel free to comment and I hope you will come again! (I promise the video quality will improve as I go, but for now this is wha'cha get...) Enjoy:

[JANUARY 2024 PHOTO & VIDEO ALBUM]

Here is a link to an article from a knowledgeable source. Check it out if you're interested...

[HORSENALITY: TESTING YOUR HORSE'S PERSONALITY]